Many parents complain about violence promoted to their children through video games, TV programs and other media. Why is it happening? What can be the solution for it? Give your opinion and include relevant examples.

With the rapid growth of technology, the world has come a long way. In the contemporary epoch,
tv
Correct your spelling
TV
show examples
,
video
games
and other
media
have become an integral part of our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. There is a range of conflicting arguments related to its pros and cons
.one
Correct your spelling
One
of the most conspicuous trends of today's world is a colossal upsurge in the number of people believing that
tv
Correct your spelling
TV
show examples
curriculums and
video
games
promote violence which affects the offspring. there is a strong reason behind
this
current scenario. It goes without saying that there are some possible solutions
Also
available to control the situation . In the ensuing paragraphs, I will not only shed light on possible reasons and solutions but
also
elaborate on my point of view regarding the matter. To embark , if we have a deep look at the Statement we will certainly be able to identify a good number of reasons why some public harbour a belief that television programs and
video
games
have a negative impact on children's growth .the first and foremost reason behind
this
is
video
games
make children aggressive . To elaborate ,
games
like pubg , cod ,
free fire
Correct your spelling
Free Fire
show examples
and many more promote violations where players have to kill other players to win . Another striking factor is some
tv
Correct your spelling
TV
show examples
programs promote violence which affects the growth of children .
For instance
, programs like CID, and CRIM PETROL spread awareness about the crimes happening around us at the same time some infants get the ideas from there to commit crimes. The same goes for social
media
. Social
media
apps like Facebook , Instagram , and Twitter not only make people lazy and introverted but
also
encourage the crowd to get involved with numerous crimes .
Although
there is a range of reasons behind the current scenario yet there are some possible solutions
also
available to improve the situation. The sensor department plays an important role.
For instance
, the schedule should be well organised or else should be age-restricted
secondly
, the school can teach them about
taking
Correct your spelling
making
show examples
right and wrong decisions. On top of that parents should pay attention to their child's activities . They should spend more time with their child so that they don't
distract
Wrong verb form
distracted
show examples
by these kinds of activities .
To sum up
, it is irrefutable to say that modern technology plays a significant role in the progress of the human race .new visual
games
and
media
helps
Correct subject-verb agreement
help
show examples
us to get knowledge about new gadgets . It can be said that it is better to use
such
technologies under adult supervision.
Submitted by shyamal017 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Task Response: The essay addresses the prompt but lacks depth and focus. It should provide a balanced argument with more specific examples to support the points.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The logical structure is somewhat clear, but the essay lacks coherence in connecting ideas. Work on transitioning between paragraphs to improve cohesion.
lexical resource
Lexical Resource: The vocabulary used is adequate, but there is room for improvement in using a wider range of vocabulary and more precise word choice.
grammatical range
Grammatical Range: The essay shows a varied use of sentence structures, but there are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement and sentence clarity.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: