IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some employers are willing to give their workers a certain amount of unpaid sabbatical time, believing this benefits the individual and the organisation. Other employers see no merit in this arrangement and discourage it. Consider the possible arguments for and against unpaid sabbatical leave, and reach a viewpoint of your own.

#employers #workers #amount #time #organisation #merit #arrangement #arguments
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Work holidays give refreshments to the worker's brain.It is argued that sabbatical leaves are beneficial for companies as well as their
employees
Use synonyms
 ,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 some bosses say that it is bad for their business.I will discuss both viewpoints and reach the conclusion by giving my opinion. On the one hand, Employers who are in favour, believe that it is going to refresh their staff member's minds, which will enhance their productivity at work.
Also
Linking Words
, as there is no pay involved in order to give them free
time
Use synonyms
, no financial burden will come to the organisation in that respect.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they see it as a positive development of their business without spending any extra money.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some businessmen think that they might lose their good
employees
Use synonyms
 just by giving them a sabbatical
time
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is because in that ,way workers going to have extra
time
Use synonyms
 which they may spend looking for other better opportunities with their competitor companies.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 may increase the running cost just because they might have to hire and train more people just to replace their
employees
Use synonyms
 on leaves.
Hence
Linking Words
 ,
usually
Add a comma
,usually
show examples
 they are not convinced by the former statement. In conclusion, I think it
is always depends
Change the verb form
always depends
show examples
 on the kind of business whether sabbatical
time
Use synonyms
 to their
employees
Use synonyms
 going to help them or destruct them.
For instance
Linking Words
, it may be helpful in the education sector to give them free
time
Use synonyms
 but may not be a good idea in the industrial sector.
Submitted by jassi.sandhu601 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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