IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Because of the global economy, many goods including what, we use as daily basics produced by other countries have to be transported for a long distance. To what extent do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#economy #goods #basics #countries #distance
Owing to
world
Correct article usage
the world
show examples
 financial system, even earlier essential necessities are imported from the farthest
countries
. It is highly lucrative.
Firstly
,
this
 essay acknowledges its pron. In the following, it is described its cons. In certain nations, suitable weather conditions make it feasible to grow enough essential food for thousands of hectares. So not only their people but
also
 who
living
Wrong verb form
live
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 other sides of the
worlds
Fix the agreement mistake
world
show examples
 benefit
Change preposition
from theses
show examples
Correct your spelling
these
show examples
theses
Correct your spelling
these
show examples
products
. What is more, in some
countries
such
 as China, due to overpopulation, a large number of workers are available which leads to reducing initial
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
.
Therefore
, other
countries
 prefer to import their needs rather than domestic production. These mutual interactions not only lead to
purchase
Wrong verb form
purchases
show examples
 by the
countries
 in need
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
 cause the sale of the
products
 in exporting
countries
. On the other side, shipping problems
such
 as long distances,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
 possibility of financial and life losses due to
nature
Replace the word
natural
show examples
 disasters, throw a spanner in the work.
Furthermore
Add a comma
,Furthermore
show examples
 it leads inflation to
generating
Change preposition
in generating
show examples
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
 because of
shortage
Correct article usage
a shortage
show examples
 in
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 has dramatically exported
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
products
.
Moreover
, users
becomes
Change the verb form
become
show examples
 too dependent and after a
while
Add a comma
,while
show examples
 they could not survive without
other’s
Fix the agreement mistake
others’
show examples
 need. In some cases, even
tiniest
Correct article usage
the tiniest
show examples
 problem broke
international
Add an article
the international
show examples
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
. for instants in coincidental accidents, leaders blame each other. To sum up,
countries
 expand their relations by importing and exporting their
products
 from far distances in the far corners of the world. It has a lot of advantages and some
rarely
Change the adverb
rare
show examples
 drawbacks.
Submitted by amirreza3348 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: