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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job.On the other hand other people think that getting experiences and developing soft skills is more important .Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#university #education #job #hand #people #experiences #skills
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There are different views about
find
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finding
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Use synonyms
occupation
Correct article usage
an occupation
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. While others argue that
university
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 is the most influential way to get
, others
Change preposition
into, others
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 claim that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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research work is the best way to have experience in our life. I, on my part, believe that we ought to study after
university
Use synonyms
students
Correct word choice
so students
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 can find their own world. To
commerce
Correct your spelling
commence
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 with the view of the former groups, there are two reasons behind their
position
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.
First
Linking Words
 is that if students get well
occupation
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, they can earn money earlier. Every teenager is able to research part-time jobs.
For example
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, my dad was given
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position
Correct article usage
a position
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 when he did not apply to the
university
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.
In addition
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 to
this
Linking Words
, if
people
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 start working some places earlier, they have
experience
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the experience
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Linking Words
to begin
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beginning
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new
Add an article
a new
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 career after
part-time
Correct article usage
a part-time
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 job.
For example
Linking Words
, in our city
the
Correct article usage
apply
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most society
find
Change the verb form
finds
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Use synonyms
occupation
Add an article
an occupation
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 to improve their skill and be incendiary to start something unusual. Definitely, other arguments exist too, but the ones mentioned, I believe
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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stand out. Turning to the latter group’s point of view, they
also
Linking Words
 have their own grounds to justify the
position
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 they hold.
First
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 of all, if society
learn
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learns
show examples
university
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 subjects after that they can possess
position
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 at workplaces more efficiently.
People
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 prefer to acquire a well-paid job despite the fact that they have not completed any related courses. Surprisingly,
people
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 study
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university
Change preposition
at university
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 and offer that find the
Correct your spelling
best
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beat
Correct your spelling
best
show examples
 work. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 desire to get a job, it is highly recommended to graduate
relating
Replace the word
related
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course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
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. I am convinced that society ought to find
occupation
Use synonyms
 after education.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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