Schools are spending more time teaching subjects such as history. Some people think they should rather spend more time in teaching skills that can help students find a job. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days in schools teachers are spending
time
non-technical
Change preposition
on non-technical
show examples
content
such
as history. It is argued that
instead
of spending
time
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
learning theory it's best to teach them technical skills which help them earn a living hood. I completely agree with the statement and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
am going to elaborate in the following paragraphs on how technical skills are helpful.
Although
history is important to us,
,,
Change the punctuation
apply
show examples
however
Add the comma(s)
,however
show examples
this
theoretical material cannot help us to earn employment. If one student spends more
time
on Job work by the
time
he comes out of college, he is ready for the job.
this
not only
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
them to find a job but
also
makes them
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
stand out among the huge competition.
For Example
Add a comma
,
show examples
a survey conducted by BSL International on students who worked during their college days found them more competent than others. It is true that learning new skills at an institution
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
young adults
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
overcome their fear and
if
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
any learning required can be easily accessible at the college, while theory subjects can be learned easily by reading and understanding.
For Instance
in
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
UK
Add a comma
,UK
show examples
the university of London has arranged a
techinical
Correct your spelling
technical
training institute to identify and train
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
interest and make them
genious
Correct your spelling
genius
generous
in their
choosen
Correct your spelling
chosen
field. In conclusion, despite theory subjects are important to know trends in the current era. I would strongly argue that learning technologies are paramount
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
education which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
help
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
adolescent to find their interest in their field
consequently
Correct word choice
and consequently
show examples
living hood.
Submitted by kadem.naresh286 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: