With the increasing demand for energy sources of oil and gas, people should look for sources of oil and gas in remote and untouched places. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of damaging such areas?

Natural energy has been found and used for hundreds of years, people mine them wherever they found ,which will pollute our
environment
. Because
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the process of mining ,it generates a lot of harmful things. As the demand for energy is becoming harder and harder, and the quality of life is becoming high, some people think that we should find them in some places inaccessible. From my perspective, the disadvantages of damaging
such
areas are more than the advantages.
Although
looking for a source of energy in
such
a place benefits us, for it protects our local
environment
.
For example
, if we remove our local factory of oil to an inaccessible place ,the decrease of harmful gas would make us become more healthy.
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
it is a kind of damage for those untouched places
such
as the natural
environment
, while the damage to the natural
environment
will destroy relative wild animals.
For instance
, in the process of looking for a new oil well, the soil and the river resource will be damaged,which gives rise to the destruction of habitats of wild animals relying on them. When a new well is found, the harmful gas generated in the process of producing petrol will pollute local air, causing the death of local birds flying through it.
Submitted by 185584258 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • unprecedented
  • unspoiled
  • hydrocarbon exploration
  • biodiversity
  • sustainable energy
  • renewable resources
  • carbon footprint
  • environmental degradation
  • ecosystem conservation
  • indigenous rights
  • climate resilience
  • habitat destruction
  • infrastructure development
  • technological advancements
  • economic stimulus
  • social unrest
  • environmental conservation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: