Most high- level positions in companies are filled by man even though the workforce in many developed countries are more than 50 percent female. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percaentage of these positions of women. Do you agree?

#high- #level #positions #companies #man #workforce #countries #percent #percaentage #women

It is argued that many top designations in organizations are dominated by males despite half of

this

portion in most rich countries

are

Wrong verb form

being

show examples

females. Companies should be compelled to give

specific

Change the article

a specific

the specific

show examples

number of these

positions

to females.

This

essay totally agrees with that statement because most

women

excell

Correct your spelling

excel

and outperform in their

academic

Fix the agreement mistake

academics

show examples

which are standard criteria to get a high- level

positions

. Nowadays, females get higher grades in most university courses. How well

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

men and

women

do is the deciding factor for a graduate student to get a top job, so it is fair enough for girls to get these

positions

. Before

man

Fix the agreement mistake

men

show examples

are seen in the top roles

such

as law and medicine but now

women

are outnumbering in these fields and should be rewarded with top

positions

For example

, a large group of female students top on the bar exam in the Philippines recently. In conclusion, men should not be given the majority of top

positions

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

businesses because

women

exceed in

academic

Fix the agreement mistake

academics

show examples

and can perform at the same level

with

Change preposition

show examples

man

Fix the agreement mistake

men

show examples

Submitted by namlaemy on Wed Dec 14 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

177 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Most high- level positions in companies are filled by man even though the workforce in many developed countries are more than 50 percent female. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percaentage of these positions of women. Do you agree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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In many countries, plastic containers have been more common than ever and are used by many food and drink companies. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?