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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

A number of countries believed to spend money on art activities various acceptable reasons, whereas opponents argue that governments should fund wellbeing and education sectors more than cultural issues.

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A number of countries believed to spend
money
Use synonyms
 on
art
Use synonyms
 activities
various
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for various
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 acceptable reasons, whereas opponents argue that governments should fund
wellbeing
Correct your spelling
well-being
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 and education sectors more than cultural issues. I definitely agree with the former idea due to the fact that I believe that there are no differences between arts and other
services
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 like schools and hospitals.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
art
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one
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is one
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 of the most essential ways to be gotten close the society and to boost the cultural level of the community.
For example
Linking Words
, establishing vary of
art
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 museums, cinemas and concert buildings enables to
create
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creation
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common
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of common
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 values for citizens. İf these places had not opened, people would not reach the opportunity which can
strength
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strengthen
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 invisible emotional communication
among
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in
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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society.
In other words
Linking Words
, spending
money
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to
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on
show examples
Use synonyms
art
Correct article usage
the art
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 sector not only
does
Unnecessary verb
apply
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has
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have
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 effects on the community in
visible
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a visible
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 way, but
also
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 it might contribute to
Correct article usage
the progress
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progress
Wrong verb form
progressing
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relationships
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of relationships
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 between the citizens.
Therefore
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, funding
art
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 definitely is not a waste of
money
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 and it has equal importance
like
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as
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 health
services
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.
On the other hand
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, no one can deny that public
services
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such
Linking Words
 as medical
services
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 and colleges
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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provide to live better
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
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 for people,
one
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are one
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 of the most crucial tools to take after its own citizens
for
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apply
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rulers. To illustrate, the progress of human history generally has been based on novelties which have involved overcoming health and education problems. In fact, history has shown that mankind could live more than it had lived thanks to the capability of medical
services
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 and it has learned that to reach
this
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 proficiency has needed
the
Correct article usage
apply
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schools. Yet,
although
Linking Words
 schools and hospitals are quite essential for society, it should be considered that
art
Use synonyms
 activities have
huge
Add an article
a huge
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 importance in the same way. To conclude, a number of people claim that states ought to spend
money
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 on colleges and hospitals more than
art
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 places, while other
believes
Change the verb form
believe
show examples
 the opposite. It seems to me that arts and other essential
services
Use synonyms
 have equal importance aspect for being crucial needs for the community.

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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