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Band 5.5

Most high-level positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 50 percent female. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percent of these positions to women. do you agree?

#positions #companies #men #workforce #countries #percent #women
In a male-dominated society,
females
 have to fight for their rights.
Although
 more than fifty per cent of the employees are
women
, the highest posts are mainly occupied by men in developed countries. There should be a justifiable way to distribute these
positions
 equally to both genders. I strongly agree with
this
 statement. In developed countries,
however
Add the comma(s)
,however
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women
 are equally competent as men, due to gender discrimination, they are not motivated and appreciated for their work.
Moreover
, take an example of any field, more than 50% of their lower staff consists of
females
.
For instance
, the hospitals are run by a male director,
on the contrary
, the working doctors and nurses are mostly
women
.
Therefore
,
females
 are not considered suitable for leading
positions
. In today's world of revolution, it is
an
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apply
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utmost importance to change the typical mindset. The companies should be held responsible to allocate a fixed percentage of
positions
 to
females
 only
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 because if they are capable enough to work in lower
positions
, they can take over the responsibility of higher posts as well.
For instance
, my mother was a school teacher for fifteen years, after that she was offered the post of Principal which she managed properly and is considered
as
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the best principal, up to date. To conclude, more
women
 work on junior levels than men because they are not promoted to senior posts. I agree with the aforementioned suggestion that a certain percentage should be kept reserved for
women
 in leading
positions
, in all companies.
Submitted by paingphyo.sg on

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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