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Band 5.5

In country where there is a high unemployment, most pupils should be offered only primary education. There is no point in offering secondary education to those who will have no hop of finding a job. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#country #unemployment #pupils #education #point #hop #job
In some places where there is a high percentage of
people
 unemployed, and get
support
 from governments. Though there are some limitations to the application to
support
, it still causes many problems for
residents
 of living.
According to
 many facts in countries, there are several difficult situations and I partially agree that
people
 can not get
support
 because of their education, I will express my ideas in
this
 essay.
Firstly
, in big consentient like America, Europe, and Australia
for instance
,
residents
 living in different areas have different rules to follow.
In other words
,
people
 from the north of Australia may get social
support
 if they lose their
job
 with the condition of none quitting themselves;
however
, citizens in the south, cannot get any aid if they do not prove that they leave the
job
 because the company fires them directly without reasons.
Secondly
, those
residents
 who lose jobs are more or less educated, so it is hard for workers to find someone to help them apply for the application to get aid from the government. On one hand, the governments in every country have built a supporting system to help
residents
 look for a
job
,
for example
, most European countries have a professional office to assist their citizens to participate in the training course for being jobseeker and match employers and employees
afterward
Change the spelling
afterwards
show examples
.
On the other hand
, after training, the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 will give each member a certification to prove that they have learned the skills. Though it does not count as credit as in the university, it helps a bunch of
people
 get new jobs without worrying about their background. The
job
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 will help members practice interviews and coach them to find suitable work;
however
, there are some bugs in the system, some
people
 apply to be
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
a job seeker
job seekers
show examples
job
 seekers, but they play tricks to fail their interviews and get the paper to prove that they need to continue training. Meanwhile, it wastes money and time to train
people
 who have the same attitude as them. In conclusion, though some benefits make
people
 back to normal life, there are
also
 many drawbacks to make
people
 lazy to find jobs and over using the systems which may lead to the systems being crushed in near future.
Submitted by zoe20130402 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • controversial
  • critical thinking skills
  • technical expertise
  • entrepreneurship
  • self-employment
  • economic diversification
  • innovation
  • vocational training
  • academic education
  • employment landscape
  • blanket approach
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