The chart below shows the value of one country’s exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

#value #country’s #exports #categories #percentage #change #category #summarise #information #features #comparisons

The charts illustrate the revenue from 5 different industries,

as well as

the percentage of fluctuation in values from 2015 to 2016.

Overall

, it is apparent that Gems and jewellery's export earnings

Change the verb form

are

show examples

the only sector that witnessed a reduction in

value

whereas

that of the other fields all increased. Petroleum and engineered goods had the highest

value

in 2015, around 61 and 58 billion

dollars

, respectively. By the following years, both of them had climbed up slightly by 3% for the former and 8,5% for the latter. Gems and jewellery generated around 43 billion

dollars

in 2015, but it immediately saw a 5.18% decrease, making its

value

dropped

Wrong verb form

drop

show examples

to 41

billon

Correct your spelling

billion

show examples

dollars

in 2016. Regarding

Remove the preposition

apply

show examples

the

last

two categories, agricultural products and textiles had

similar

Add an article

a similar

show examples

pattern

Fix the agreement mistake

patterns

show examples

as they both climbed up in export

value

in 2016.

However

while

agricultural goods only

winessed

Correct your spelling

witnessed

a minimal growth of just 0.81%, textiles had the biggest percentage change in

value

in all of the

industires

Correct your spelling

industries

industry

, at 15.24%.

Nonetheless

, the revenue of these two sectors was nearly the same, at approximately 32

billiond

Correct your spelling

billion

dollars

in 2016.

Submitted by loanqnu97 on Sun Feb 05 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words value, dollars with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "climbed" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.

▼

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

183 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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