Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree

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I strongly disagree that (with the statement of) some
people
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believe that a high
salary
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is much more important than
job
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satisfaction
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. Because
job
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satisfaction
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leads to good health and a successful
career
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rather than a big
salary
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. First and foremost,
people
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who are satisfied with their jobs are the healthiest because of their well-being and excitement.
These kind
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This kind
These kinds
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of
people
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do not stress about their
job
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and love everything they do in their daily life.
Additionally
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, they do not expect too much
salary
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, because it is happy for them to
fulfill
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fulfil
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their basic needs.
In contrast
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,
big
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big-salary
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salary
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jobs could be given
bunch
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a bunch
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of
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
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and tasks.
This
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much work leads to some psychological or other health problems.
On the other hand
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,
job
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satisfaction
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provides
valuable
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a valuable
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and long-lasting
career
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path
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paths
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for workers.
The most
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Most
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people
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could reach success by doing their dream
job
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. It means that
people
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are likely to spend their most time on
favorite
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favourite
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things and it leads to success after
long
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a long
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time. Spending a lot of effort usually creates a good result.
Additionally
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,
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career
Add an article
the career
a career
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of
people
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who love their jobs is significantly consistent and long-lasting because they are being fulfilled by
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
satisfaction
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everyday
Replace the word
every day
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. Oppositely, if
person
Add an article
a person
the person
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do
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does
show examples
Use synonyms
job
Correct article usage
a job
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for only
big
Correct article usage
a big
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salary
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, it usually does not
last
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long. Because it is all about money and they have no purpose or dream about their
job
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.
To sum up
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, it is a statement that
big
Correct article usage
a big
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salary
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is much more important than
job
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satisfaction
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;
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however
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,however
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I strongly disagree
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this
Change preposition
with this
show examples
statement for two reasons. For me, taking
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
job
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satisfaction
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is much better than getting a high
salary
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because it leads to good health and successful
career
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points.
Submitted by ganorgil0927 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • remuneration
  • financial security
  • motivation
  • luxuries
  • material possessions
  • fulfillment
  • work-life balance
  • stress levels
  • mental well-being
  • job security
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