IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In many cities, the use of video cameras in public places is being increased in order to reduce crime, but these measures restrict our individual freedom. Do the benefits of increased security outweigh the drawbacks?

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It is true that the number of installed
cameras
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 has
being
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been
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 increased in many countries all over the world to deter crime.
However
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, a segment of society is satisfied with these
cameras
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, others believe that they have invaded our privacy. First and foremost,
the
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apply
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surveillance
camera
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at
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in
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 public places leads to the restriction of our personal freedom. These
cameras
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 capture and record every moment which
make
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makes
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 some people feel uncomfortable and lead them to act carefully.
While
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 it is not a major issue, it can be certainly a nuisance at some times. Even so, I would approve that the benefits
from
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of
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 expanded recorder
cameras
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 in the streets are more effective than its limitations.
Firstly
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, these
cameras
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 can offer safe public places by reducing criminal activities.
Secondly
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, seeing surveillance
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camera
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cameras
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 in the place might put people off criminal
behavior
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behaviour
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. They understand that they are being watched and
this
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 prevented them from doing crimes.
For example
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,
Kuwait
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in Kuwait
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, which is a safe country, the rate of crimes has
been
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apply
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decreased in the latest years
due to
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 the spread of
the
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apply
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recorded
cameras
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 everywhere. Of course, all too often, the existence of police officers helps
the
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apply
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society to be safer by deterring
the
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apply
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people from crime, but the
camera
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 has advantages over
the
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apply
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human law keepers. Unlike a human police officer, the
camera
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 does not fall asleep and plays all the time
in
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on
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 all days. In conclusion, the features of utilizing video
cameras
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 around cities to improve
security
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the security
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 of the society overweigh the disadvantages.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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