Some people feel that government should take a large proportion of people's salaries to pay for necessary public services such as roads and school. Other feel that high taxes are a bad thing. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The phenomenon of a high tax rate
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
charged by the government in order to enjoy
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public services has aroused wide concern among various circles. Divergent as people's views on
this
issue in question may be. I totally agree that using
money
to exchange services and facilities is the best idea. Of all the reasons why
this
is the best
apporach
Correct your spelling
approach
, probably the most significant one is that those services or public facilities require
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
massive
money
to maintain their operation and
existing
Replace the word
existence
show examples
. Most countries
relay
Correct your spelling
rely
show examples
on the tax claimed from their citizens. Without
this
process, their government cannot even function.
Beside
Replace the word
Besides
show examples
,
those
Change the determiner
that money
show examples
money
always use to help the country in
contiune
Correct your spelling
continue
develpment
Correct your spelling
development
for the purpose of
keep
Change the form of the verb
keeping
show examples
the pace of
technology
Replace the word
technological
show examples
development will not
slower
Add a missing verb
be slower
show examples
than
othe
Correct your spelling
other
nearly
Change the adverb
near
show examples
countries
such
as transportation, public
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
centre, medical facilities, etc.., which would
benfits
Correct your spelling
benefit
the most of the people. Another reason that should not be overlooked is that it would help people to
guaranty
Replace the word
guarantee
show examples
thier
Correct your spelling
their
elderly life.
For example
, many elders are living alone and do not have any family or
friend
Fix the agreement mistake
friends
show examples
; As
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time going as they get older, their work
proformance
Correct your spelling
performance
will decline
gradualy
Correct your spelling
gradually
unit they completely lost the ability in earning
money
to afford
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
basic spending. To prevent that,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
have some policies to help their citizens to save
money
and ensure
them
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
can acquire their needs when they are older. Under
this
line of thinking, it seems to me that
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
tax rate would make
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
money
spending
Replace the word
spent
show examples
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
the most effective and proper way
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
us and
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
.
Therefore
, I completely agree with
this
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
idea that larger salaries should be submitted to the country.
Submitted by frankyimp on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportion of salaries
  • necessary public services
  • infrastructure
  • redistribute wealth
  • wealth gap
  • equitable
  • discourage
  • economic growth
  • innovation
  • tax evasion
  • tax avoidance
  • tax revenue
  • burdensome
  • human capital
What to do next:
Look at other essays: