IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

People hobbies and interests change over time and are more a reflection of trends and fashions than an indication of what individuals really want to do in their spare time. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer. You should use your own ideas, knowledge, and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

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Some individuals chose to spend their leisure
time
Use synonyms
 with
regards
Fix the agreement mistake
regard
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 to the public trend rather than spending it in a productive manner. I strongly believe that,
people
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's interest in spending their free
time
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 doing more valuable activities
such
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 as performing exercise and family
time
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. Nowadays,
people
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 are becoming busier in meeting the demands of their daily lives.
However
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, many individuals are still conscious when it comes to their
overall
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 wellness.
People
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 use their free
time
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 at work in doing relaxation
technique
Fix the agreement mistake
techniques
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such
Linking Words
 as breathing and
strecthing
Correct your spelling
stretching
 exercises.
Moreover
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, spending their free
time
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 wisely
help
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helps
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 the employees
re-charge
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recharge
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 their body and concentrate
in
Change preposition
on
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 the job.
For instance
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, in my
workplace
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,workplace
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 we are given a
30 minute
Add a hyphen
30-minute
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breaktime
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break time
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 and
i
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I
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 spend it eating
my
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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healthy snacks and socializing with my colleagues.
This
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 kind of relaxation inspired me to be more efficient and productive at work. Another reason is
people
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 chose to allocate the rest days with their families to have a simple family gathering. Apart from that, some individuals
proritise
Correct your spelling
prioritise
 family
time
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 because it's a way of showing love to them. They prefer to have dinner and some games that would encourage participation among family members.
In addition
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, others like parents love to bring their children
in
Change preposition
to
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 the park and playground where they could maximize the space for them to be able to do physical activities.
For instance
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, every
weekends
Change to a singular noun
weekend
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 my husband and
i
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I
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 always see to it that we bring our children to their favourite restaurant and
then
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 go to
park
Add an article
the park
a park
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 to do some playing to burn all the calories that we had. In conclusion, spending leisure
time
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 depends on the
people
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's impact nor
others
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others'
other's
show examples
 preference on how to use it. I strongly believe,
people
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 should value
free
Add an article
the free
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 that they have because it would help maintain a healthy body both physically and emotionally.

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