The charts below show the percentage of volunteers by organizations in 2008 and 2014.

#show #percentage #volunteers #organizations

The pie charts show the percentage of

volunteer

people

in various kinds of

organizations

in 2008 and 2014.

Overall

, the percentage of

volunteer

people

in environmental,

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

, and

health care

Correct your spelling

healthcare

show examples

organizations

increased

whereas

the proportion of

volunteer

people

in other types of

organizations

decreased.

In addition

, the

overall

percentages of all

organizations

varied over a given period of time. In 2008, participation of

volunteer

people

environmental

Add an article

the environmental

an environmental

show examples

organization

Fix the agreement mistake

organizations

show examples

, arts and education was 21%, 18% and 24% respectively. Most of the

volunteers

took part in educational

organization

Fix the agreement mistake

organizations

show examples

with 24%.

Change preposition

show examples

the same time, sports and others had

same

Change the article

the same

show examples

percentage of participation of

volunteers

which was 15%,

while

only 7%

volunteers

Change preposition

of volunteers

show examples

took part in health care. In 2014, significantly more

volunteers

worked in environmental and

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

organizations

compared with the other fields, at 29% and 25% respectively. Meanwhile, the figures for art and other

volunteers

both fell by 6%. There was

also

a slight fall in

volunteers

in educational

organizations

, at 17%,

while

volunteering in health care was still the least preferred option, at only 8%.

Submitted by Mrjit147 on Thu Feb 23 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall, while".

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words volunteer, people, organizations, volunteers with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "fell" was used 2 times.

▼

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

174 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The charts below show the percentage of volunteers by organizations in 2008 and 2014.

as computers are being used more and more in education, there will be soon no role for teachers. at what extent do you agree or disagree

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. It is suggested that primary children should learn how to grow vegetables and keep animals. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? You should write at least 250 words.

Some think the current generation should take steps to protect the environment for the next generation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

People who live in large cities face a range of problems in their daily life. What are the most significant of these problems? How can these problems be tackled?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.