The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
This
bar chart demonstrates Change preposition
to us
us
the rate of Correct pronoun usage
apply
men
and women
from
various Change preposition
of
ages
who did regular physical exercises in Australian
in 2010.
As seen in the chart Correct your spelling
Australia
the
Correct article usage
apply
women
who are between 45 and 54 ages
have the highest rate of doing sports with a percentage
of 53.3 whereas
the highest exercising age of men
are
15-24 and Change the verb form
is
this
percentage
is 52.8. Moreover
, men
’s percentage
39.5 have lowest
physical activity from 35 to 44 Correct article usage
the lowest
ages
. In addition
, rate
of Correct article usage
the rate
women
is 47.1 that are 65 and over
Correct your spelling
overages
ages
.
Between 25 to 34 ages
participants who account for Change the noun form
age
female
proportion of 48.9 are higher than Add an article
the female
a female
Add an article
a male
male
whose proportion is 42.2. 39.5 Fix the agreement mistake
males
percentage
of Replace the word
per cent
men
and 52.5 percentage
of Replace the word
per cent
women
exercise regularly at
the range of 35 to 44 years old .
Change preposition
in
Similarly
, we almost observe equal percentages between 45-54 ages
and 55-64 ages
. Relatively, while
the 45-54 ages
of men
group are 43.1 , women
are 53.3 besides
45-54 ages
of men
group are 45.1 and women
are 53.
Compare with women
and men
participation over 65 Change noun form
men's
ages
, women
participations are Change noun form
women's
percentage
47.1 a little bit higher than men
participation Change noun form
men's
percentage
46.7
.
these Change preposition
of 46.7
ages
of men
increase regular exercise %2Add the comma(s)
, on the other hand,
on the other hand
these ages
of women
decrease exercise %0.3.Submitted by eesra.kuzuu on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women, ages, percentage with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 8 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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