IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people support the idea of imposing taxes on fossil fuels (oil, coal and gas) in order to reduce energy consumption. Others disagree with this approach. Consider the debate and its arguments, and come to your own conclusion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
 era of technology, some individuals believe that taxes should be imposed on fossil fuels
Linking Words
such
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
in relation to
reduce
Change the verb form
reducing
show examples
 energy usage
among
Change preposition
in
show examples
 society
while
Linking Words
 others reject
this
Linking Words
 notion. From my point of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view
show examples
, I agree
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the above statement as it
contribute
Change the verb form
contributes
show examples
 to lower carbon emission and
improve
Change the verb form
improves
show examples
electronic
Add an article
the electronic
show examples
 product.
This
Linking Words
 essay will
further
Linking Words
 elaborate my views, and
thus
Linking Words
 will lead to a logical conclusion. Supporting my agreement to the given statement, if
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
taxes
are implement
Change the verb form
are implemented
show examples
 on fossil
fuel
Fix the agreement mistake
fuels
show examples
, it
consequently
Linking Words
reduce
Change the verb form
reduces
show examples
 the energy consumption by
Add an article
the user
a user
show examples
user
Fix the agreement mistake
users
show examples
 which in turn less carbon emission
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 the atmosphere.
In addition
Linking Words
, it creates
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
better air quality
throught
Correct your spelling
throughout
through
 the country and
reduce
Change the verb form
reduces
show examples
 the chance of air pollution in the future.
For example
Linking Words
, health issues
due to
Linking Words
 air infection in America is at
alarming
Add an article
an alarming
show examples
 rate
due to
Linking Words
increase
Correct article usage
the increase
show examples
 in
Correct article usage
the numbers
show examples
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of cars in the city area which become
major
Add an article
a major
show examples
contribution
Replace the word
contributors
show examples
 to
this
Linking Words
 issue.
Thus
Linking Words
, it is a good idea for the government to include
Correct article usage
a tax
show examples
tax
Replace the word
taxing
show examples
fossil
Change preposition
on fossil
show examples
fuel
Fix the agreement mistake
fuels
show examples
. Another point in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
with
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
Linking Words
 view,
Add an article
a
the
show examples
tax upon these
source
Fix the agreement mistake
sources
show examples
 of energy will improve the demand
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 electronic products which are
environmetal
Correct your spelling
environmental
environmentally
 friendly and less unwanted
substance
Fix the agreement mistake
substances
show examples
 that might harm the environment.
For instance
Linking Words
, the
used
Replace the word
user
show examples
 of electronic cars in Japan had
growth
Replace the word
grown
show examples
 significantly and the citizen
seem
Change the verb form
seems
show examples
 to enjoy its benefit.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it is crucial for
authority
Fix the agreement mistake
authorities
show examples
 in every country to educate their people about new electronic power supplies.
To conclude
Linking Words
, fossil
fuel
Fix the agreement mistake
fuels
show examples
 cause harmful
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
 on
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 health.
Thus
Linking Words
, the best approach to deal with it
by
Add a missing verb
is by
show examples
 implementing taxes on its use. Hopefully,
this
Linking Words
 effort will create a better life for
further
Linking Words
generation
Fix the agreement mistake
generations
show examples
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • mitigate
  • renewable energy
  • economic impact
  • regressive tax
  • alternative strategies
  • energy conservation
  • public transportation
  • green infrastructure
  • global cooperation
  • consistency
  • accountability
  • polluter pays principle
  • sustainable development
  • energy efficiency
  • fiscal policy
  • carbon footprint
  • environmental sustainability
  • energy policy
  • tax incentives
  • climate change
What to do next:
Look at other essays: