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Band 5.5

The first chart shows the population of England and Wales between 1700 and 2000. The second chart gives information about the birth and death rate in the same countried in the same period.

The first chart shows the population of England and Wales between 1700 and 2000. The second chart gives information about the birth and death rate in the same countried in the same period.
#first #population #england #wales #second #information #birth #death #rate #period
The first bar graph illustrates how the number of people in England and Wales changed over
Correct article usage
a 300-years
show examples
300-years
Correct your spelling
300-year
 period of time
whereas
 the second chart gives data on birth and death
rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
show examples
 for the same countries and time period. The population had increased gradually from 1700 to 2000 and from 1800 to 1900 the amount had more than doubled from around 16 million to 48 million
whereas
 over the next 100
years
Add a comma
,years
show examples
 the growth rate was comparatively less. When it comes to the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of people born and died, there can be seen rapid changes from 1700 to 2000. Both parameters had increased
continously
Correct your spelling
continuously
 up until 1800
where
Correct word choice
when
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 reached
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 peak
then
 gradually decreased during
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 200 years. In 2000,
number
Change the article
the number
show examples
 of deaths had reduced
in
Change preposition
by
show examples
 almost half
comparing
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
 to the number of births.
Submitted by vishvaisuranga on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
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