The charts show the percentage of people working in different sectors in Town A in two years, 1960 and 2010

#show #percentage #people #sectors #town #two #years

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The pie chart depicts the number of working candidates in different departments in the years 1960 and 2010 in Town A.

Overall

, the manufacturing department stands out with the increase in the percentage of workers comparatively between the years. And

in contrast

, the other two sectors have seen their downside in the year 2010 from 1960.

To begin

with, a large number of people preferred to work in 1960 in the service department with a percentage of 41 and

in contrast

, It has decreased by almost more than half the percentage in 2010 to 20%.

Similarly

, the manufacturing department

also

showed some promise at the beginning, but people tend to lose interest in

this

field too, with a number of only 16% in 2010. Next, manufacturing is unique when compared to the other two sectors.

That is

to say, it is the only sector which is not as popular as services in 1960 with adults preferring only 29%. But

due to

large development in recent years, more than half the people are working in the manufacturing section with a significant rise to 64% which is three times more than sales and services.

Submitted by yashwanth1plus on Sat Mar 18 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in contrast".

▼

Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.

▼

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

192 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
In many countries, students' concentration in the classroom has decreased. What are the reasons for this? What are some possible solutions?
In some nations, students can not concentrate completely in the classroom and this figure is decreasing. I think the rules have changed and they do not consider studying as a valuable process and also they have been distracted by technology.
7
band
Although nowadays many people have access to sports facilities, modern lifestyles are becoming less and less active. What problems are associated with this? How can people be persuaded to have a more active lifestyle?
There is no denying the fact that the majority becoming less energetic. However, in current days individuals have permission to sports facilities. The primary issue is people are busy they do not have enough time to join sports facilities. To have a more active lifestyle, the higher authorities should place massive prizes on the citizens to encourage them to participate in extracurricular activities.
5
band
Topic: In some countries, an increasing number of children are overweight or obese as a result of eating too much fast food. Banning fast food from school canteens is the best way to fight this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It has always been a controversial issue whether lots of pupils are fat as they are keen on eating unhealthy food in some countries, thus fast food court should be banned at schools to tackle this problem. In my opinion, however we are not allow to prevent students’ rights, these kinds of methods have to done at schools.
<4
band
nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. do you think is a positive or a negative development?
Today, some individuals instead of going to the doctor when they are sick, take drugs and do treatments on their own. In this essay I will give my viewpoints and the drawbacks outweigh the benefits.
7
band
In the modern world, many employees lack soft skill such as communication and working in the teams. What are the main causes of this problem? What are the effects of the lack of such skills ?
In recent years, the lack of soft skills such as communication and working in teams has grown. The development is the result of various factors, which can have a negative impact on both employees and employers.

The charts show the percentage of people working in different sectors in Town A in two years, 1960 and 2010

In many countries, students' concentration in the classroom has decreased. What are the reasons for this? What are some possible solutions?

Although nowadays many people have access to sports facilities, modern lifestyles are becoming less and less active. What problems are associated with this? How can people be persuaded to have a more active lifestyle?

Topic: In some countries, an increasing number of children are overweight or obese as a result of eating too much fast food. Banning fast food from school canteens is the best way to fight this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. do you think is a positive or a negative development?

In the modern world, many employees lack soft skill such as communication and working in the teams. What are the main causes of this problem? What are the effects of the lack of such skills ?