Some people say that history is one of the most important subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history.

#people #history #subjects #today’s #world #science #technology

It is generally believed by some that the importance of teaching

science

and

technology

in school is more than other

subjects

history

while

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

others claim that

history

is one of the particular school's

subjects

. I opine that neither

science

nor

technology

could be in

higher

Correct article usage

a higher

show examples

position rather than any

subjects

Fix the agreement mistake

subject

show examples

including

history

. Some

people

think that some lessons must have priorities above

history

Science

and

technology

which are called future lessons are playing a significant role

Change preposition

show examples

innovation and invention. Inventing new objects or methods could help

people

directly to comfort their lives .

This

relaxation is considered

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a beneficial phenomenon which can stand above

history

On the other hand

, some

people

argue that

history

is vital for human life which can put it as one of the important educational

subjects

and I agree . Reviewing past human lives is essential because ancestors had committed some mistakes and knowing these may avoid

people

from repeating them. If

people

reduce making mistakes , they can move forward faster which may lead them

Change preposition

to advancing

show examples

advancing

Change the verb form

to advance

show examples

life patterns. Obviously, more achievements may be a big step toward having

better

Add an article

a better

show examples

life .

Moreover

history

is an ancestral tale about

people

who had done sacrifices or criminal commitments .gathering data whole over them make

make

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

their memories unforgettable. Always remembering good

people

and

also

their

Change the pronoun

the

show examples

great influence

Change preposition

show examples

their activities on human beings

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

may make the feeling of caring and kindness stronger in

people

's hearts .

As a result

this

emotion,

people

will be encouraged to behave

similar

Change the adjective

similarly

show examples

to their delightful ancestors which could improve

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

social behaviours in public .

To sum up

, there are various views about

this

occasion, but in my opinion,

although

science

and

technology

are essential in nowadays world,

it's

Replace the word

its

show examples

importance could not

be places

Change the verb form

be placed

show examples

above the

history

among

Change preposition

show examples

scholastic lessons .

Submitted by ha.mahsa73 on Sat Apr 01 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

309 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

cultural heritage
innovation
critical thinking
economic development
technological literacy
well-rounded education
societal reflection
workforce readiness
climate change
comprehensive understanding
fostering continuity
rapid changes
integrate
interdisciplinary approach
contextualize

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
In our modern world, the choices made by young people in relation to beginning a career are changing with many university-age people opting to undertake training in the workplace. While this has numerous benefits for both society and the young, some drawbacks can also be observed.
6
band
You are going on a month training programme to the UK and know that the head of the course would like one of the participants to be the social events' organiser. Write a letter to the Training Organiser. In your letter • expressing your interest in the role • requesting more information about it • explaining what experience you have Begin your letter as follows: Dear ..., You should write at least 150 words.
I am writing this letter to request you to participate in the social event, as you know that I am heading for a month for a training programme in the UK and you are looking for an organiser for the seminar.
5.5
band
A good friend has just changed schools and is having difficulty fitting in and needs your advice. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter • make suggestions as to how they could make friends • suggest joining clubs, participating in school activities • give any extra general advice You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear..., You should write at least 150 words.
I hope you are dong great. I know you are feeling uncomfortable to fin in at your new education center. I am writing this letter to give you some suggestions and ideas to tackle this issue.
4
band
You have just returned from holiday and were not satisfied with your trip. Write to the travel agency. In your letter •Say where / when you went on holiday •Explain why you are not satisfied with your holiday •Tell them what you would like them to do
I'm writing to complain about just returning from holiday and were not satisfied with my trip. I went to Da Lat City last month with my family to relax at the end of the year.
5.5
band
Many people use distance learning programmes to study at home, but others think that it cannot bring the benefits as much as attending college or university. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
With technological advancements learning has not been restricted to classes only. There are number of people who think that distance learning is not a good option. According to my prespective both methods have their own pros which will be discussed in the impending paragraphs.

Some people say that history is one of the most important subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

You have just returned from holiday and were not satisfied with your trip. Write to the travel agency. In your letter •Say where / when you went on holiday •Explain why you are not satisfied with your holiday •Tell them what you would like them to do

Many people use distance learning programmes to study at home, but others think that it cannot bring the benefits as much as attending college or university. To what extent do you agree or disagree.