The diagram below shows how rain water is collected and then treated to be used as drinking water in an Australian town. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows how rain water is collected and then treated to be used as drinking water in an Australian town. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
This
diagram depicts how rainfall is combined and
then
gets treated to be drinkable in an Australian town. It is clear from the graph that purifying the
water
undergoes five stages to procedure success.
According to
what is shown, the rainwater after falling above the houses,
water
goes into drains following
this
step the
water
gets in the filter, and after that, it is collected in huge storage.
Moreover
,
subsequently
Add a comma
subsequently,
show examples
the collected
water
goes into the
water
treatment process which
also
has chemical ‏substances.
Finally
,
this
treated
water
is used in houses as a drinkable
then
the processing will be cycling.
To sum up
, we could say that rainwater undergoes five phases, starting with the filtration of impurities and finishing with a treatment machine.
Submitted by jqanber4 on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 69%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words water with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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