The pie charts below show the percentage of time working adults spent on different activities in a particular country in 1958 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

#show #percentage #time #adults #activities #country #summarise #information #features #comparisons

The pie charts show the adults who spent time on different

activities

in 1958 and 2008.

Such

as Sleeping, travelling, working, going out, and other

activities

. The percentage of working, relaxing at home and travelling to work rise compared to 1958

furthermore

the fraction of other

activities

, sleeping and going out with family and friends dropped the way adult spend their time. In 1958 the highest number of senior persons spending their time working

hence

in 2008

also

increased from 33% to 42%. Other

activities

remain still same at 6% in 1958

as well as

in 2008.

However

, the percentage of sleeping diminished from 32% to 25% in 2008.

Moreover

, going out with family or friends fraction in 1958 was 19% and decreased to 6% in 2008. Travelling to work was 2% and it rise by 4% compared with 1958. They started to relax at home more, which resulted in

Correct article usage

a 5

show examples

% growth contrasted that in 1958.

Submitted by deshani97dias on Fri Apr 21 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words activities with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.

▼

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

156 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The pie charts below show the percentage of time working adults spent on different activities in a particular country in 1958 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case ? Do you think that this is a positive or a negative development?

Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace. Do the benefit of this mobility outweigh the disadvantages?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Some people say that all students should study history as a major subject, while others feels that other subjects are important for children in today's society. Discuss both sides and give your opinion .

Many people believe that good planning is the key factor to success in life, while others believe that other factors like hard work or luck are important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.