IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many people think that job satisfaction is important in work. Do you think young people these days should be sure of job satisfaction before taking a new job or should they put salary first?

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Many
people
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 believe that not only money but
also
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job
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satisfaction
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 are both important essence when they looking for a
job
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. I completely agree with
this
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 opinion. I will explain my reasons
in
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apply
show examples
below
Correct article usage
the below
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paraghraph
Correct your spelling
paragraph
. When young
people
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 especially those who are just graduated from school,
job
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satisfaction
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 is much more important than
salary
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 when they looking for their first
job
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. If they can obtain
satisfaction
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 from the
job
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, they will feel happy and have more motivation to learn more new skills. When they learn more skills, they will become an important employee in their company. After that, they have more opportunities to get promotions or make
salary
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 negotiations.
Although
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salary
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 is a main factor for
job
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 seekers,
however
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, there are other things that need to be considered. If
people
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 put money
first,
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they may choose a
job
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 with a better wage that they do not like it.
This
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 may cause them upset or depressed on working days. These
people
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 do not have passion for their
job
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.
Besides
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, they do not want to learn or upgrade their personal skills. Day by day, they just
waste
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a waste
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of
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apply
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their time and energy. It is definitely a nightmare for young
people
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. In conclusion, I agree that
job
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satisfaction
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 is more important than
salary
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 when young
people
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 looking for a new
job
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. A
job
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 with
satisfaction
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 will bring more opportunities for young
people
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 in long term.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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