IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic. Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

#minutes #topic #people #manufacturers #supermarkets #responsibility #amount #goods #customers
Pacakaging
Correct your spelling
Packaging
 of commodities plays a pivotal role in increasing its sales credibility because
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of
massess
Correct your spelling
masses
 buy products that simply
captures
Correct subject-verb agreement
capture
show examples
 their attention. A group of
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 adheres to the notion that producers and retailers should be obliged to reduce packaging,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 some
people
 opine that consumers should avoid buying products with redundant packages. In my perspective, manufacturers should be held responsible to stop unwanted packaging of the product because
people
 cannot control packing as they are the end users. Producers of the goods and commodities are the prime source who design packages or are primarily linked with package designing.
Therefore
, they are more responsible than other
people
 involved in the entire process of
byuing
Correct your spelling
buying
 and selling for reducing the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of boxes and wrappers used to secure the actual product. Supermarkets can actually play a part by not accepting unnecessarily wrapped items for sale but they cannot re-do the process because of certain obligations related to food
handelling
Correct your spelling
handling
 and safety.
Moreover
, shops can be converted into storage rooms where everything
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
can be stored in bulk
inspite
Correct your spelling
in spite
 of small packets. For an instance, alike petrol, cooking oil can be sold
through
Change preposition
by
show examples
 installing pipelines at supermarkets and customers can carry their own
canesters
Correct your spelling
canisters
casters
everytime
Replace the word
every time
show examples
 they buy. Consumers can
also
 play a part in reducing the problem of excess packaging by being rational towards nature.
People
 should
also
 avoid buying products with multiple layers of packaging stuff. It is not judicious to blame others all the time, every single individual is responsible for their actions and
havoc
Correct article usage
the havoc
show examples
 they are causing by accepting everything.
Now-a-days
Correct the word
Nowadays
show examples
 many refills are available,
people
Correct word choice
and people
show examples
 should imbibe the habit of refilling and reusing in place of repurchasing. To
examplify
Correct your spelling
exemplify
, empty
bottels
Correct your spelling
bottles
 of body wash can be easily refilled with available refill pouches
in contrast
 to buying a whole plastic
bottel
Correct your spelling
bottle
 again. To recapitulate, in my
opinion
Add the comma(s)
,opinion
show examples
 to mitigate
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the problem of packaging everybody should play a part. Someone, whether
customer
Correct article usage
a customer
show examples
 or manufacturer has to draw a line and should firmly stick to it.
However
, I reckon producers are more responsible than customers in order to stop excessive packaging.
Submitted by navjotkaur12363 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: