Some people believe that the country would benefit a lot from a large number of young people who enter into university; however, others think that the large number of people receiving the education of university only leads to graduate unemployment. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

There is no doubt that the youth of a
country
is the key to its development.
Although
few political critics argue that
huge
Change the article
a huge
the huge
show examples
number of college graduates
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
to the issue of
shortage
Correct article usage
a shortage
show examples
of
jobs
in the market, many believe that a nation can thrive if it has a large educated pool of generation supporting it. I completely agree with the latter point of view. In
this
essay, I will discuss both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
views and explain with examples certain factors
such
as
growth
Add an article
the growth
show examples
of the
country
, to my support. It is a known fact that unemployment is one of the biggest challenges that the world is fighting today.
Due to
this
issue,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
college
students
are
loosing
Replace the word
losing
show examples
faith in the system and themselves, as they are forced to do odd
jobs
despite having a decent college education. Take
for
Add the comma(s)
,for
show examples
instance, the engineers who are working as servers at cafes because they do not have
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
work opportunities in the market. A recent survey demonstrated that every year, more than 43%
university
Change preposition
of university
show examples
pass-out
students
suffer the same fate of employment.
Further
, since most of these
students
take loans for their studies,
thus
inability to pay these loans
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
show examples
a lot of bad debt for the
country
.
However
, the problem of employment is not something
unsurmountable
Correct your spelling
insurmountable
show examples
.
On the other hand
, we should remember that an educated population can take a
country
to any desired height. Educated youth can become leaders and politicians who can drive their
country
in a better direction.
For example
, during the pandemic time, a
well read
Add a hyphen
well-read
show examples
leader was required to understand the impact of the situation and take progressive steps,
while
ensuring the safety of its people.
Further
, these
students
can
propell
Correct your spelling
propel
the growth of the economy multi-folds by contributing in the field of engineering, space research, finance and
what not
Correct your spelling
whatnot
show examples
. They can be the ones to create more
jobs
in the economy and
tacke
Correct your spelling
take
tackle
the problem of unemployment. If there were not enough
well read
Add a hyphen
well-read
show examples
people in the system, a
country
would not sustain the economical and
polictical
Correct your spelling
political
challenges in the global ecosystem. In conclusion,
while
an unemployed pool of
candiates
Correct your spelling
candidates
may be
percieved
Correct your spelling
perceived
as a burden on available
jobs
, a
country
can reap far more benefits
such
as increased contribution
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
economy
Add an article
the economy
show examples
and
well being
Add a hyphen
well-being
show examples
of the citizens. .
Submitted by apoorva.badola on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • innovation
  • economic growth
  • research and development
  • competitive
  • global stage
  • quality of life
  • critical thinking skills
  • worldview
  • oversupply
  • job market mismatch
  • graduate unemployment
  • underemployment
  • vocational training
  • technical skills
  • skilled trades
  • functional workforce
  • balanced approach
  • aligning education
  • market needs
  • diverse educational pathways
  • lifelong learning
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