The bar chart below shows the percentage of students who passed their high school competency exams, by subject and gender, during the period 2010-2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the percentage of students who passed their high school competency exams, by subject and gender, during the period 2010-2011.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar chart shows
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information on the proportion of students who passed competency exams in their high school, by subject and sex in 2010 and 2011. A period of 11 years.
Overall
, it can seem that women were good in computer science and higher than in other subjects.
In contrast
, they were poor in geography and geography was the lowest score for a student who was a girl.
Firstly
,computer science was subject that many students passed exams at 98.4 per
cent
. Followed by mathematics and foreign languages were 91.1 per
cent
and 94.1 per
cent
respectively.
In addition
,
boy
Correct article usage
the boy
show examples
was lowest in chemistry at 14.1 per
cent
and the girl was lowest in geography at 20.1 per
cent
. In general, we can say that during the period in
question
Add a comma
,question
show examples
girls performed better in most subjects in the competency exams than boys.
Submitted by itchayatop31 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words cent with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Competency exams
  • High school
  • Pass rate
  • Disparity
  • Performance gap
  • Subject-specific analysis
  • Year-to-year progression
  • Regression
  • Overall trends
  • Significant
  • Notably wide/narrow
  • Conclusion
  • Observations
  • Consistencies
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