The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in defferent age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Summarise the infromation by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comarisons where relevant.

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The bar gives information about the proportion of Australian men and women in different

age

Use synonyms

categories who did exercise in 2010. It is important to note that females did more exercise than males in all

age

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groups

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except 15 to 24. The 15 to 24 male

age

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group

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who did 52.8% work out was the highest rate in comparison with other

groups

Use synonyms

and 35 to 44 which is just under 40% was the lowest proportion among male

groups

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

25 to 34,45 to 54 and 55 to 64 were well above 40%

in contrast

Linking Words

with 65 and over which was 46.7 higher than them. In Female

groups

Use synonyms

45 to 54 which was 53.3% is higher than other Female

age

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groups

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moreover

Linking Words

, there were other

groups

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with close rates which were 35 to 44 and 55 to 64 which respectively were 52.5 and 53.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, the 65 and over

age

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group

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of Females had the lowest rate of 47.1% compared with 25 to 34 which was 48.9.

Also

Linking Words

, the 15 to 24 Female

group

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with 47.7% was lower than the 25 to 34 Female

age

Use synonyms

group

Use synonyms

Submitted by mirhashemim7 on Sat May 20 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words age, groups, group with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

185 words

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The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in defferent age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Summarise the infromation by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comarisons where relevant.

Nowadays employment options are changing and employees cannot rely on having the same job and working conditions throughout their life. What are some possible causes? Suggest some ways to plan for the future under these circumstances.

Some people think that wild animals should not be kept in zoos. Athers believes that there are good reasons for having zoos. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In the past, people lived in one place for a long time , but now they can live in many different places what are the reasons ? Is this positive or negative development ?

Nowadays, some parents pressure their children to be successful in a specific field. What are the reasons for this? Is it negative or positive?

The number of advertisements for charities on television and the internet seems to be increasing. What is causing this ? Is this a positive or negative development ? Give reasons for your answer & include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.