IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The bar charts shows the details the percentage of two types of television programmes, namely reality and game shows watched by males and females in different age groups in Australia.

The bar charts shows the details the percentage of two types of television programmes, namely reality and game shows watched by males and females in different age groups in Australia.
#bar #percentage #two #television #programmes #reality #game #males #females #age #groups #australia
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The bar charts
shows
Change the verb form
show
show examples
 the details
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
 percentage of two types of television programmes, namely
reality
Use synonyms
 and game shows watched by males and females in different age groups in Australia. It can be seen from the graph that, women
demonstrates
Correct subject-verb agreement
demonstrate
show examples
 an upward trend by taking in 70 % regarding
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
reality
Use synonyms
 shows. In comparison with
reality
Use synonyms
 shows, the proportion of males and females who watch game shows
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 similar between with each other. In terms of
reality
Use synonyms
show
Fix the agreement mistake
shows
show examples
, the lowest percentage was people aged 16-24, at around 52% and the highest proportion was individuals between the ages of 45 and more, with approximately 68%. As regards
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
game shows, inhabitants aged 25-34 watched less than any other age
groups
Fix the agreement mistake
group
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, the figure for games shows proves that was the most popular entertainment
programmes
Fix the agreement mistake
programme
show examples
 among people aged 45+ than other age groups . People aged 45+
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 the most amateurs of these two shows.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words reality with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 8 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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