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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The table below shows the consumption of three basic foods (wheat, maize, rice) by people in four different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the consumption of three basic foods (wheat, maize, rice) by people in four different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The food consumption could vary from country to another and that could be as a part of so many reasons like some of these countries could has a population, the food tyoes that they are used to eat, if we took four countires in example Campodia, Poland, Egypt and Mexico we will find out that the highest consumption in
rice
Use synonyms
 would be in Campodia, in the other hand people dont seem likely to
use
Use synonyms
 much of
wheat
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 and it has the lowest rate as
calories
Use synonyms
 per person and they
also
Linking Words
use
Use synonyms
 one hundered and three of
Maize
Use synonyms
, If we took a look on another country
such
Linking Words
 as egypt we will find out that the people in it consume more
calories
Use synonyms
 of
wheat
Use synonyms
 per person per
day
Use synonyms
 which is about 1095 and
also
Linking Words
 they
use
Use synonyms
 501 of
rice
Use synonyms
 and 578 of
Maize
Use synonyms
 which is quite the highest between the two other countries
such
Linking Words
 as Campodia and Poland, since we mentiond Poland the
rates
Use synonyms
 of consume for the person per
day
Use synonyms
 it has minimum
rates
Use synonyms
 the
Rice
Use synonyms
rates
Use synonyms
 would be 19 and they dont
use
Use synonyms
 the
Maize
Use synonyms
 at all and actually their consumption is centered on
Wheat
Use synonyms
 by 865
calories
Use synonyms
 per
day
Use synonyms
, that leaves us with Mexico that
use
Use synonyms
 57 of
rice
Use synonyms
 and 275 of
wheat
Use synonyms
 and the has the highest
rates
Use synonyms
 on
Maize
Use synonyms
 by 1083
calories
Use synonyms
 per
day
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, such".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words rice, use, wheat, calories, maize, day, rates with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 1 basic words for charts were used.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumption
  • basic foods
  • staples
  • dietary preferences
  • agricultural output
  • nutritional intake
  • per capita
  • predominant
  • subsistence crops
  • culinary habits
  • food security
  • statistical overview
  • consumption patterns
  • comparative analysis
  • domestic production
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