The graphs below give information about computer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2002 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2002 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words. (20 mins.)

The graphs below give information about computer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2002 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2002 and 2010.  Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.  Write at least 150 words.   (20 mins.)
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The graphs illustrate a percentage of
computer
Use synonyms
accessibility, where the first
graph
Use synonyms
shows the general population’s trend between 2002 and 2010, and the second
graph
Use synonyms
shows the relationship
of
Change preposition
between
show examples
computer
Use synonyms
possession and education divided by various levels from the years 2002 and 2010. In the first
graph
Use synonyms
, in 2002,
computer
Use synonyms
usage was at 55%, which rose gradually to about 5% every 2 years and reached 75% in 2010. In total, the percentage of
computer
Use synonyms
usage grew significantly by about 20% in an 8-year period. The second
graph
Use synonyms
presents the same direction of the growth of
computer
Use synonyms
accessibility in the educational market, in which the proportions of those who hold higher graduation qualifications were notably higher than those with lower education levels in both years.
For example
Linking Words
, in 2002, the
rate
Use synonyms
of no
highschool
Correct your spelling
high school
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diploma was around 15%,
while
Linking Words
the
rate
Use synonyms
of postgraduate qualification was around 75%. In comparison, in 2010, the
rate
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of no
highschool
Correct your spelling
high school
show examples
diploma escalated to about 45%,
while
Linking Words
the
rate
Use synonyms
of postgraduate qualification almost reached the peak
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
about 95%.
Overall
Linking Words
, the proportions of those below the bachelor’s
degree
Use synonyms
level increased by approximately 30%,
while
Linking Words
the figure for bachelor’s
degree
Use synonyms
and master’s
degree
Use synonyms
holders rose by around 20%, which is 10% less. In conclusion,
computer
Use synonyms
ownership generally increased
for
Change preposition
by
show examples
about 20% between 2002 and 2010.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in 2002 and 2010, no
highschool
Correct your spelling
high school
show examples
diploma, high school
graduate
Fix the agreement mistake
graduates
show examples
and college students gained significantly greater access, by up to 30%,
while
Linking Words
bachelor’s
degree
Use synonyms
and postgraduate qualification holders expanded the usage of computers at the same level
of
Change preposition
as
show examples
the general trend by 20%.
Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words computer, graph, rate, degree with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 5 times.
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 5 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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