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Writing Samples
Band 5

The bar chart below shows the hours per week that teenagers spend doing certain activities in Chester from 2002 to 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons.

The bar chart below shows the hours per week that teenagers spend doing certain activities in Chester from 2002 to 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons.
#bar #hours #week #teenagers #activities #chester #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given bar chart elucidates the activities and the number of
hours
Use synonyms
 spent on them by
the
Correct article usage
apply
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teenagers per week in Chester from 2002 to 2007. Clearly, watching television was the most common
activity
Use synonyms
 for which the maximum number of weekly
hours
Use synonyms
 were spent,
whereas
Linking Words
 the least
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
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activity
Use synonyms
 was bowling. The weekly
hours
Use synonyms
 spent by
the
Correct article usage
apply
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teenagers
in
Change preposition
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going to pubs kept increasing from 2002 to 2004, which was constant till 2006.
However
Linking Words
, there was a surge in the weekly
hours
Use synonyms
 spent on the
activity
Use synonyms
 in 2007. Watching television was the most common
activity
Use synonyms
 and the
hours
Use synonyms
 spent were constant from 2002 to 2003.
However
Linking Words
, it kept increasing from 2004 to 2007. The
hours
Use synonyms
 spent shopping, playing sports and doing homework were comparable. Watching DVDs saw an increase in weekly
hours
Use synonyms
 spent from 2002 to 2004 and a considerable decrease from 2005 to 2007. The least
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
activity
Use synonyms
 was bowling, with nearly 1-3 weekly
hours
Use synonyms
 spent by teenagers.
Submitted by himaanshusingh74 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words hours, activity with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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