IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The chart below shows the proportion of businesses making e-commerce purchase by industry in Canada between 2015 and 2019

The chart below shows the proportion of businesses making e-commerce purchase by industry in Canada between 2015 and 2019
#proportion #businesses #e-commerce #purchase #industry #canada
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The purchase
growth
Use synonyms
 of different e-commerce businesses spread from 2015 to 2016 is provided in the bar chart provided. Neither does the chart provide the reasons behind all these trends nor the reasons why they are not correlated with one another. In general, these businesses can be divided into two groups based on their
stability
Use synonyms
 and the highest
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
growth
Use synonyms
. Construction, wholesale, and retail had stable
sales
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 manufacturing and
information
Use synonyms
 and communication fluctuated.
Firstly
Linking Words
, from the
growth
Use synonyms
stability
Use synonyms
stand point
Correct your spelling
standpoint
show examples
, the
information
Use synonyms
 and communication type of
business
Use synonyms
 is portrayed as a well-established
business
Use synonyms
 where it has
a stable purchases
Correct the article-noun agreement
a stable purchase
stable purchases
show examples
 in 2016, 2017, and 2019 with a total proportion of purchases of 70% in each
year
Use synonyms
. It is followed by retail with the same feature of being steady at selling in the same
year
Use synonyms
. Unlike the two, wholesale shows a different trend of
stability
Use synonyms
 in selling where its total
sales
Use synonyms
 per
year
Use synonyms
 tend to increase. From a
business
Use synonyms
 ,perspective it is considered stable with a tendency to increase throughout the years when
this
Linking Words
information
Use synonyms
 was collected.
Secondly
Linking Words
, with regard to the highest
growth
Use synonyms
, the
information
Use synonyms
 and communication
business
Use synonyms
 setting is considered the highest with the highest proportion of
sales
Use synonyms
 being more than 70% in 2018. It is,
then
Linking Words
, followed by wholesale and manufacturing especially if the
year
Use synonyms
 2019 is considered. These two have a proportion of
sales
Use synonyms
 of approximately 60%. All in all, the
stability
Use synonyms
 and total
sales
Use synonyms
 of an e-commerce
business
Use synonyms
 matter if one has to make a decision on selecting a more profitable
business
Use synonyms
. Based on the
information
Use synonyms
 presented, it is sparring that a good
business
Use synonyms
 should have had much better
stability
Use synonyms
 and outstanding performance on its purchase as explicitly shown in the
business
Use synonyms
 setting of
information
Use synonyms
 and communications. One should aim for
such
Linking Words
 a
business
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by ieltscuns2022 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words growth, stability, sales, information, business, year with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "provided" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 6 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trends" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stability" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: