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The charts detail the proportion of Australian secondary school graduates who were unemployed, employed or further education in 1980, 1990, and 2000.

#detail #proportion #australian #school #graduates #education
The pie charts below illustrate the information about the status of Australian
highschool
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high school
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 graduates over 20 years.
Overall
,
while
 the rate of people pursuing
further
 education had a downward trend, employed students witnessed a remarkable growth. Noticeably, there was a minimal change in the rate of jobless ones. In 1980, accounting for 50%, the proportion of students who continuously studied in academic programmes was the highest, followed by the percentage of employed and unemployed people with 40% and 10% respectively. After a decade,
this
 figure significantly decreased to 38%,
then
 maintained its one-third proportion in the following 10 years.
On the other hand
, beginning with 40% in 1980, the number of graduates successfully applying for their jobs went up by 10% in the next decade
,
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 and moderately increased to 55% from 1990 to 2000,
then
 became the majority.
Additionally
, after rising marginally from 10% to 12% in 2000 the figure for people who were unemployed saw a sharp fall to 8%, the lowest over a 20-year period.
Submitted by cathyngo1512 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay has a clear logical progression, with ideas introduced, developed, and summarized effectively.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices and paragraphing to enhance the clarity and flow of the essay.
task achievement
Fully address the task by providing a comprehensive summary of the main trends shown in the charts, including all substantial details.
task achievement
Develop main points with specific details and examples where applicable to strengthen the response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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