IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

You are going to take a short holiday in Singapore and you want to rent a holiday apartment while you are there. Write to the tourist information office. In your letter: -Explain what you need. -Say when you plan to be there. -Ask for information about prices.

#holiday #singapore #rent #apartment #tourist #information #office #-explain #-say #plan #-ask #prices
Dear Sir, I am John an Indian citizen. I am writing to enquire about the
hotel
 Express Inn where I want to book a suite
room
 for one week. I need a
room
 in the
hotel express inn
Correct your spelling
Hotel Express Inn
show examples
 as mentioned above.
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
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 the
room
 has to be an adjoining
room
, as we are 3 members who will be staying. In ,
fact
Add an article
a fact
the fact
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 I have heard
this
hotel
 has a nice view of the sea, so I would like you to book a
room
 which has a sea view. ,
Furthermore
Add a comma
Furthermore,
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 I need a rental car for sightseeing and
also
 a tourist guide to give us information about the city where we will be visiting. I will be arriving in Singapore on 23/11/24 which is exactly after 2 weeks. I will be arriving at the airport at 3:05am,
Certainly
Add a comma
Certainly,
show examples
 I would like you to book a car for a pick-up from the airport to the
hotel
.
Along with
 it, I would like you to send me the price of the details that I included, you can send me on my e-mail I'd. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, John
Submitted by vishwakarma.mangesh68 on

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task response
The letter adequately addresses the requirements of the task with some room for improvement in clarity and coherence.
coherence and cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriate, but the organization and flow of ideas within paragraphs could be improved for better coherence and cohesion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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