IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The line graph presents three common criminal activities in England and Wales between 1970 and 2005.

The line graph presents three common criminal activities in England and Wales between 1970 and 2005.
The charts reveal the three most occured criminal activities in England and Wales for 35 years from 1970.
Overall
Linking Words
, the three most occurred criminals (car theft, house burgling, and street robbery) had an increase compared between 1970 and 2005.
First,
Linking Words
car theft which has the most common crime with 0.4
million
Use synonyms
 occurred in 1970 and increased steadily to 1
million
Use synonyms
 by the year 1990. By 1995, it hit a peak of 1.6
million
Use synonyms
 and declined suddenly to 1
million
Use synonyms
 in 2005.
Moreover
Linking Words
, house burglary with the second most common crime started at 0.2
million
Use synonyms
 in 1970. 1980 witnessed a gradual rose to 0.6
million
Use synonyms
. For the next 25 years, which began in 1980 began to fluctuate and ended just below 0.6
million
Use synonyms
 in 2005.
Lastly
Linking Words
, street robbery has a stable trend between 1970 and 1990 at the pace of 0.1
million
Use synonyms
. 1995 started to rocket up to 0.2
million
Use synonyms
 by the end of the year.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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