IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The pie charts show information about energy production in a country in two seperate years.

The pie charts show information about energy production in a country in two seperate years.
#show #information #energy #production #country #two #seperate #years
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The given pie charts
details
Change the verb form
detail
show examples
 information about the variety of
energy
Use synonyms
 sources
distribution
Replace the word
distributed
show examples
 in a particular country in 2005 and 2005 across 5 different sectors: coal,
gas
Use synonyms
,
petro
Correct your spelling
petrol
, nuclear and other production.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is readily apparent that coal and
gas
Use synonyms
 in both years remained the largest source of
energy
Use synonyms
 supply. Whilst
gas
Use synonyms
, coal, nuclear and other categories shared the same upward trend, an opposite pattern was observed in petro.
To begin
Linking Words
, it is noticeable that most of
Use synonyms
energy
Add an article
the energy
show examples
 manufacturing came from
gas
Use synonyms
 and coal, which were roughly equal with each
accounted
Wrong verb form
accounting
show examples
 for above a quarter of all five sectors. By 2005, coal and
gas
Use synonyms
 both witnessed
minimal
Correct article usage
a minimal
show examples
 rise at 30.93% and 30.31%, respectively. It is worth noticing that petrol was
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
third-ranked
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
one of the most vital
energy
Use synonyms
 sources in 1995,
however
Linking Words
, it sharply plunged to 19.55% in 2005.
In contrast
Linking Words
, producing
energy
Use synonyms
 from
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
 was the least
favored
Change the spelling
favoured
show examples
 form of manufacturing
while
Linking Words
 there was
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
substantial growth, but still made up a minor percentage of all five categories. With regards to
nuclear
Correct article usage
the nuclear
show examples
 section, in 1995, it constituted only 6.40%, withal, increased to 10.10% after 10 years.
Submitted by anhthu3826 on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, gas with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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