These days, more and more schools focus on science and social science subjects and choose not to teach children to sing, paint, sculpt, write creatively or dance. Should school-children study the arts?

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Nowadays, in many countries around the world,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

children

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are tend

Change the verb form

tend

show examples

to be taught more

science

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and social

science

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subjects

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than

arts

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as painting, singing, or dancing. In my opinion,

arts

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should

also

Linking Words

be given to the school program alongside

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

science

Use synonyms

and social

science

Use synonyms

subjects

Use synonyms

. Granted, one might argue that

science

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and social

science

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subjects

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play an important role

for

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show examples

the development of

students

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bring

Wrong verb form

bringing

show examples

them

necessary

Add an article

the necessary

show examples

amount of knowledge to step into the modern world. Some people think that learning core

subjects

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in school is adequate for

children

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to grow up.

This

Linking Words

line of reasoning is not sound as

arts

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

help

children

Use synonyms

to improve significant skills that bring practical benefit to their lives.

Firstly

Linking Words

, by studying art,

students

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could have better creativity and expression. The

arts

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provide a platform for

students

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to express themselves creatively, and

and

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

creative thinking is essential for problem-solving and innovation in all areas of life.

For example

Linking Words

, if

individual

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the individual

an individual

show examples

is good at dancing, that one will be confident to be

showed

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shown

show examples

at a party and may receive good feelings from those who

present

Add a missing verb

are present

show examples

there. The main

subjects

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that

children

Use synonyms

study in school play a crucial role in a well-rounded education. It helps them get

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

related professional knowledge in order to get higher education.

However

Linking Words

arts

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also

Linking Words

contribute to the holistic development of

students

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While

Linking Words

engaging in artistic activities,

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

helps

children

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explore and understand their

motions

Correct your spelling

emotions

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thus

Linking Words

, it brings them

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

emotional intelligence.

Moreover

Linking Words

, by exposing

with

Change preposition

show examples

Use synonyms

arts

Correct article usage

the arts

show examples

sooner, young people could not only improve

the

Change the word

their

show examples

communication skills

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

Linking Words

the

Change the word

their

show examples

culture

Replace the word

cultural

show examples

awareness. Through art, they could learn to convey ideas, thoughts, and emotions in diverse ways. In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

science

Use synonyms

and social

science

Use synonyms

subjects

Use synonyms

are undoubtedly important for developing critical thinking and problem-solving skills, the

arts

Use synonyms

contribute to the

emotion

Replace the word

emotional

show examples

, creative and

culture

Replace the word

cultural

show examples

aspect

Fix the agreement mistake

aspects

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of student ‘s growth. An education that includes both disciplines equips

students

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with

boarder

Correct article usage

a boarder

show examples

set of

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

, enhancing their

overall

Linking Words

capabilities and

prepare

Wrong verb form

preparing

show examples

them to navigate the complexities of

modern

Add an article

the modern

show examples

world.

khoiminhnguyen1411Wed Jul 26 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

336 words

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These days, more and more schools focus on science and social science subjects and choose not to teach children to sing, paint, sculpt, write creatively or dance. Should school-children study the arts?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays, some people are changing their way of look through hair colour, cosmetics and even plastic surgerie. What are the reasons? Is it a good thing?

Some people say that it is. A waste of time to learn literature such as a novel and poems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some societies, more and more people are deciding to live alone. Why do you think this is? Do the advantages of living alone outweigh the disadvantages?

Despite huge improvements in healthcare, the overall standard of physical health in many developed countries is now falling. What could be the reason for this trend, and what can be dome to reverse it?

What do you think is the best way to find a job: by gaining more knowledge and education or through more practical skills? Explain your choice, using specific reasons and details.