The line graph below illustrates the percentage of tourists to England who visited four different attractions in Brighton over a period of 30 years between 1980 and 2010.

#line #percentage #tourists #england #four #attractions #brighton #period #years

The diagrams provide information about the

qualities

Fix the agreement mistake

quality

show examples

of visitors to the UK for some

tipe

Correct your spelling

types

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

attractions in Brighton from 1980 to 2010.

Overall

, applying

Correct article usage

a smallet

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smallet

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smallest

small

minority of the total to

pier

Add an article

the pier

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However

, to

pavilion

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the pavilion

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, art

gelleres

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galleries

and festivals

Add a missing verb

have aproximately

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aproximately

Correct your spelling

approximately

same

Correct article usage

the same

show examples

qualities.

It is clear that

pier

Correct article usage

the pier

show examples

was out of favour for

tourist

Fix the agreement mistake

tourists

show examples

in 1980(10%).By applying the contrast, festivals

was

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were

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virtually

biggest

Correct article usage

the biggest

show examples

atrractions

Correct your spelling

attractions

attraction

with 30% in 1980.

Although

, art

galleres

Correct your spelling

galleries

took just 22% in 1980.

While

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

pavilions

atractions

Correct your spelling

attractions

was begin in 1980 from 23%

then

by far surged to just 48% after

15-year

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15 years

and ended

Change preposition

at 31

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Change the preposition

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the end of the period.

Whereas

, pier

atractions

Correct your spelling

attractions

was

Correct subject-verb agreement

were

show examples

completed with 22% in 2010.

Although

, art

gellery

Correct your spelling

gallery

gradually increased to the top 35% in 1985 and ended with 9%.

Submitted by pasha2400 on Wed Aug 02 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "although".

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

127 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The line graph below illustrates the percentage of tourists to England who visited four different attractions in Brighton over a period of 30 years between 1980 and 2010.

Nowdays, a growing number of people with health issue problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?.

In some countries, criminal trials are shown to the public on television. Do the advantages of this tren outweigh the disadvantages?

Do you think exams are a good way to test students?

TOPIC: Covid-19 may be a catastrophe for human beings, but a therapy for Mother Nature. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.