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Traffic and accomodation problems are increasing and government should encourage some businesses to move from cities to rural areas. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#traffic #accomodation #government #businesses #move #cities #areas
Nowadays, many
people
 choose to live in
capital
Add an article
the capital
a capital
show examples
 city or near business
district
Fix the agreement mistake
districts
show examples
due to
 time efficiency. There is an idea of moving several business
activity
Change to a plural noun
activities
show examples
 to
suburbs
Correct article usage
the suburbs
show examples
, and they
concern
Add a missing verb
are concern
show examples
 about the hard access to
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
.
However
, I hold the view that the merits outweigh the demerits. On the one hand, business
district
Fix the agreement mistake
districts
show examples
 in
suburbs
Correct article usage
the suburbs
show examples
 will slowly destroy
environment
Add an article
the environment
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, especially the factory of textile. The waste give a huge contribution and
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to severe problems,
likewise
 flood, air pollution, and water pollution.
Therefore
, the individuals' quality of life might decrease as their
environment
destroyed
Add a missing verb
is destroyed
show examples
 by
coorporations
Correct your spelling
corporations
. Bogor,
for instance
, has a village with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
clear air, but it changes when factories
builded
Correct your spelling
build
 in that village.
Consequently
, it
worsen
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worsens
show examples
 not only the transportation access
,
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apply
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 but
also
 the
environment
.
On the other hand
,
this
 idea is important
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 balancing the number of
people
 who live in cities.
In addition
, the number of population who live in
capital
Correct article usage
the capital
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 area
is increase
Change the verb form
is increasing
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 steadily, as it is the main income resource. If the government establish
this
 policy,
people
 would have a peaceful
live
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life
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 since they can live in
suburbs
Correct article usage
the suburbs
show examples
.
Moreover
, the society there would be empowered and could work near their home, which can
thus
declining
Change the verb form
decline
be declining
show examples
 the number of
persons
Replace the word
people
show examples
 who came to
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
. In conclusion,
although
 companies'
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
show examples
 have
Correct article usage
the possibilities
show examples
possibilities
Fix the agreement mistake
possibility
show examples
 to worsen the
environment
, it would give
people
 in the
suburbs
 the
opportunities
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunity
show examples
 to gain huge income. I
firmly
Add a missing verb
am firmly
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convince
Change the form of the verb
convinced
show examples
 that the government should legalize
this
 policy, and establish strict rules for the employees so that they could not harm the
environment
.
Submitted by sidneynatasha16 on

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Linking words for giving examples:

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  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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