IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The line graph below shows the percentage of tourists to England who visited four different attractions in Brighton.

The line graph below shows the percentage of tourists to England who visited four different attractions in Brighton.
The graph below depicts parts of the GDP in the United Kingdom between 1992 and 2000
Overall
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, Gross domestic product from the IT and Public Service industries both experienced an upward trend over the period, but with different figures. It is lucid that Information Technology witnessed a significant rise in 2000 of just above 14.5
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percent
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per cent
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, in comparison to 1992, where the GDP had been six
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percent
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per cent
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. Meanwhile, the service industry (SI) had a gradual increase from 1992 to 2000 of 4
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percent
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per cent
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 to approximately eight
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percent
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per cent
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respectively
Punctuation problem
, respectively
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. It is apparent that
SI
Correct article usage
the SI
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 were less contributing to the GDP of the UK than Information technologies.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the information sector had more numbers at the beginning
as well as
Linking Words
 just almost double of figures of SI in 2000, to be more precise at the start of the period it was 6% and 4% and by the end of the period it had been 14.5% in comparison with 8 per cent.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "comparison" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 3 times.
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