Fewer students are studying science at school and university, favoring more computer-based subjects instead. Is this a positive or negative development? What are the reasons for this? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

It has been stated that computer-based subjects are chosen over
science
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in many schools and other tertiary institutions.
This
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trend, which I believe is a negative one, is a result of growing advancements in
technology
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and indecision among
students
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. One of the primary reasons why digital curricula have become so favoured by
students
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is the significant growth of
technology
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, especially in artificial intelligence. Introduced to the public just recently, artificial intelligence and other forms of
technology
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have proven to be extremely
potential
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promising
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areas to work in in the future with their applications in producing robots, art, advertisement and so on.
This
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has resulted in the
number
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of
students
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aspiring for a career in
this
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area and enrolling in computer-based programs surging dramatically.
Besides
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, a vast majority of people are unable to make decisions about their studies and just follow the temporary trends regardless of their interests.
For example
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, in recent years, many individuals have chosen to study
robot
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robotics
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engineering, causing the
number
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of applicants for the subject to increase significantly. In my opinion, the trend where
students
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opt for computer-based programs and not
science
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is negative. First and foremost, if
students
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continuously turn down
science
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studies,
science
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teachers will face the risk of being
fired
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fired,
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as there are not enough
students
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to run the classes.
Consequently
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, the unemployment rate in the society may rise considerably, retarding the development of a country.
For instance
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, a large
number
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of biology teachers in Vietnam have lost their jobs in the
last
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two years
due to
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an inadequate
number
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of
students
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applying. Another downside to consider is that as the vast majority of people pursue an occupation
regarding
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in
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technology
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, other fields will have to cope with the insufficiency in their workforce, leading to a financially unbalanced community. In conclusion, computer-based curricula becoming more popular in institutions, from my perspective, is an outcome of innovative
technology
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and
students
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’ indecisiveness. As it deprives
science
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teachers of their income and creates an unbalanced society, I strongly believe it is a negative development.

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task response
Your answer is clear on the main view, but add more strong ideas and a quick note of any other side. Give more real facts or clear checks that show why you think this is bad.
coherence cohesion
Start each paragraph with a clear idea. Use simple links to move from one point to the next. Check that the idea in each paragraph stays on one point only.
grammar
There are many grammar and word choice errors. Watch verb form and wrong words. Example: 'extremely potential areas' should be 'potential areas' or 'good options'.
lexical resource
Use simple and exact words. Some phrases are long or off. Try to say 'This is a bad trend because...' instead of a long line.
structure
The essay has good plan but tell more with a strong example for each point. A short counter view can also help.
task position
View on the topic is clear.
organization
There is a plan with intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
examples
Some real examples from life are given.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Career prospects
  • Digital innovation
  • Economic growth
  • Perceived as
  • Accessible
  • Practical fields
  • Traditional science fields
  • Expertise
  • Innovation
  • Environmental science
  • Integration of computer technologies
  • Primary field of study
  • Long-term implications
  • Research and development
  • Critical scientific areas
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