Since the 18th century technological advance have replaced people in the workplace. with today's technology this process is happening at a greater rate. Technology is increasingly responsible for unemployment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#century #advance #people #workplace #technology #process #rate #unemployment

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Nowadays, numerous companies have applied a regulation of employment in their systems. Some of them are covered with highly developed

machineries

Change the wording

machinery

types of machinery

pieces of machinery

show examples

integrated within their daily work basis. I personally agree that

this

attachment of modernization has brought the renewal system of working.

Thus

, I assume that

this

phenomenon impacts the unemployment rate today. On the one hand, the primary reason why I agree that

machines

have replaced

people

in their job fields is that the

technologies

which a company embraces are extremely advanced. These

machines

may change the number of roles in the workplace. An example of

this

is in human-basis positions. Many

people

who consider themselves operators have been no longer working for a company. It is because advanced

technologies

have taken their occupations since they are eligible to execute more

works

Fix the agreement mistake

work

show examples

than a human does.

On the other hand

, the other reason why I would argue that advanced

technologies

take an account for high rates of unemployment is that

machines

and engines are considered valuable for some business holders. They believe that hiring

people

will cost much expenditure and human-resource departments should cut

this

large budget as they still hire humans to work.

However

machines

are pressing

this

financial problem because the only thing a machine needs regularly is maintenance by engineers and

this

only costs less than paying

people

with huge salaries. In conclusion, I totally agree that the background of large numbers of jobless

people

is caused by the companies that have been implementing the integration of

technologies

within their workplace.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Wed Sep 06 2023

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task response

Ensure that all main points and examples are directly related to the topic

coherence cohesion

Use a wider range of cohesive devices to improve coherence and cohesion

lexical resource

Expand vocabulary to express ideas more precisely

grammatical range

Work on sentence structures and grammatical accuracy

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

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Since the 18th century technological advance have replaced people in the workplace. with today's technology this process is happening at a greater rate. Technology is increasingly responsible for unemployment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

Some parents think that childcare centres provide the best services for children of preschool age. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents will be better carers for their kids.

Studying art in school improves students' performance in other subjects, because it is easier for multi-skilled students to learn new things. That's why art should be obligatory in schools. Do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible solutions?

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skill. Do you agree or disagree?

A lot of places in the world rely on tourism as a main source of income. Unfortunately, tourism can also be a source of problems if it is not managed correctly. Describe the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in the modern world. Do you think that benefits of tourism outweight its drawbacks?