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Band 6

Women and men are commanly sees as havinv different stregths and weaknesses.It it right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender?

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As we know, we live in a male-dominated society where both
men
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 and women are treated differently. The rule makers of society or the elders of the family limit their strengths and weaknesses . I don't think it is right to stop them from certain professions on account of their gender. In most of the developing countries in the present context, we can still see a male-dominated society where
men
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 are treated as superior to
females
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. They are thought to be more intelligent and powerful than women. They are underestimating the willpower of
females
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. Contrary to
this
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, they treat women as some sort of domestic servant. Most of the people are not aware that
men
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 and female are the two sides of the same coin. Without each other ,support life would have been impossible. For , example from the journey of giving birth to raising ,children all responsibilities go on the head of the mother. Father simply goes to a job and pays the hospital bills but Mother has to go through everything alone.
Although
Linking Words
men
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 are the primary earners in the house,
females
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 should
also
Linking Words
 get the opportunity to prove them. Rather than working alone, I think, they should work
hand
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 in
hand
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 by supporting each other. Despite considering
men
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 as the superior of the family and letting them make decisions alone, I think,
females
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 should
also
Linking Words
 get involved in combined decision-making. They both should be treated equally with each and every facility and opportunity rather than treating a specific gender in a special manner. In most of the
,
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apply
show examples
cases
females
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 have to do housework
while
Linking Words
men
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 go to work. I think both of them should have the right to make their own decisions
instead
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 of getting set by boundaries.
Overall
Linking Words
, I think, working
hand
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 in
hand
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 with each other might be the better solution rather than excluding them as they are different from each other which leads to their different perspectives.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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