The bar chart shows the information of the number of volunteers and paid workers in 4 different roles in the sports sector of an Australian town in 2015.

IELTS Writing Task Chart for The bar chart shows the information of the number of volunteers and paid workers in 4 different roles in the sports sector of an Australian town in 2015.

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The provided bar chart illustrates the number of

volunteers

Use synonyms

and paid employees across four job positions in the sports field of an Australian town in the year 2015.

Overall

Linking Words

, the majority of

volunteers

Use synonyms

opted for coaching,

while

Linking Words

paid employees favoured other roles over coaching, referees and

therapists

Use synonyms

To begin

Linking Words

, over 70 unpaid

workers

Use synonyms

took on coaching, followed by just under 60

volunteers

Use synonyms

engaging in other roles, with approximately 45 people working as

therapists

Use synonyms

in 2015.

However

Linking Words

, only just over 30

volunteers

Use synonyms

chose to become referees, representing the minority of unpaid

workers

Use synonyms

among the four different roles.

In contrast

Linking Words

, approximately 45 paid employees engaged in coaching, followed by

therapists

Use synonyms

and other jobs, almost 41 and just under 50

workers

Use synonyms

, respectively.

Additionally

Linking Words

, just under 40 individuals decided to work as referees, a number similar to that of

therapists

Use synonyms

, slightly above 40. In conclusion, it is clearly seen that coaching was the most preferred role among

volunteers

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

refereeing was the least preferred for both paid and unpaid

workers

Use synonyms

innakireeva0101Mon Sep 11 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words volunteers, therapists, workers with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "just under" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

166 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

bar chart
volunteers
paid workers
roles
sports sector
Australian town
duties
motivations
significance
contribution
professionalism
specialization
sustainability
distribution
trends
volunteerism
community engagement
professional development
accessibility

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The bar chart shows the information of the number of volunteers and paid workers in 4 different roles in the sports sector of an Australian town in 2015.

Prison is the comman way in most countries to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to provide people a better education. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people feel that governments should take a large proportion of people' salaries to pay for public services such as roads and schools. Other thinks high taxes are bad. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some believe that money for education should mainly be spent on better computers while others believe it would be better spent on teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools or disagree? To what extent do you agree

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?