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Band 5

Some people today believe that the world increases in population is unsustainable and will eventually lead to a global crisis. Other people believe that world population increase is necessary and beneficial as it creates the growth of the world’s economy and society. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #world #increases #population #crisis #growth #world’s #economy #society
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people
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 become an essential
art
Correct your spelling
part
show examples
 of our life.
However
, there is no absolute agreement on whether growth in population should be beneficial or unsustainable. A commonly held belief is that
Correct article usage
the worlds
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worlds
Change noun form
world's
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 economy and society are
increases
Wrong verb form
increasing
show examples
 every day only
due to
 the
fact
thatthe
Correct your spelling
that the
 amount of population. As evidence of
this
Add a comma
,this
show examples
 they point to
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 percentage of successful individuals nowadays, which is rise' up every year.
Due to
 the
fact
 that every year
world's
Correct article usage
the world's
show examples
 populations increase.
Furthermore
, teenagers are
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 more productive and motivated at the present time. It could be explained by the
fact
 that nowadays there are a lot of opportunities, which gives a chance to be successful.
As a result
, it leads to a bright
future
 for
Correct article usage
the worlds
show examples
worlds
Change noun form
world's
show examples
 economy and society.
On the other hand
, some
people
 claim that there are a number of chances for global crisis rather than for
successful
Correct article usage
a successful
show examples
future
.
For example
, they may mention that it will be hard to keep
on
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
 eye on everyone, chiefly if it will increase in
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of
people
.
In addition
, lies in the
fact
 that
current
Correct article usage
the current
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 government
begins
Wrong verb form
has begun
show examples
 to make more robots
which are
Verb problem
that
show examples
 can easily replace a human in various types of
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
.
Therefore
, our world may be full of
people
 which is
finally
 can be
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 beginning of chaos and tough time in the
future
 time. In conclusion, taking everything mentioned into account I would argue that with
rise
Correct article usage
a rise
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up
Change preposition
apply
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in population there can
also
 increases
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 chances for a better
future
 with
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 growth of
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
show examples
 and society.
Submitted by dimash171206 on

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Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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