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Band 3

Due to globalization, many countries lose their traditions and national values. Some people think it is the responsibility of governments to protect these values. Do you agree or disagree?

#globalization #countries #traditions #values #people #responsibility #governments
Term
Correct article usage
The term
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 'globalization' defines as the growth of a
country
. Some people believe that
due to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the inclined rate of trade or capital change in two nations has vastly
effected
Correct your spelling
affected
show examples
 the traditional
value
Fix the agreement mistake
values
show examples
 of one
country
,
that's
Correct word choice
and that's
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 why individuals think that it is up to the government to inherit cultural values.
This
 essay will present both in favour and
oppose
Wrong verb form
opposing
show examples
 views.
To begin
 with, every
country
try
Correct subject-verb agreement
tries
show examples
 their best to take one step ahead in terms of economy and technology from other countries. All the countries are linked with each other with some business or trade,
for
example
Add the comma(s)
,example
show examples
 import and export of goods.
Human kind
Correct your spelling
Humankind
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 is
a
Change the article
an
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 adaptive nature. By visiting
another countries
Replace the adjective
another country
other countries
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 or
by
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apply
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watching their dramas or movies, people start copying their characters, to exemplify, clothes, food, living
style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
.
However
, people should understand the fact that every
country
 has their own cultural values, which are very important to remember, so that,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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future generations don't forget about their ancestors and their tradition.
Government
Correct article usage
The government
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 should open more museums to show youngsters their
tradition
Fix the agreement mistake
traditions
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. In schools and in colleges cultural plays should be organized
instead
 of
western
Capitalize word
Western
show examples
 party activities.
To sum up
all
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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,
government
Add an article
the government
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 should organize some cultural activities to keep their tradition intact, so that, other nations recognize us
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
 our
culture
Replace the word
cultural
show examples
 values.
Submitted by jsubains123 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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