the charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did no go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008. summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevent.

#show #uk #graduate #students #go #work #college #summaries #information #features #comparisons #relevent

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The two bar charts illustrate the information about the students who completed their graduation and post-graduation but they haven't got a fixed job in the year 2008. In

this

Linking Words

information full-time job is not included.

overall

Linking Words

, the two diagrams clearly

shows

Change the verb form

show

show examples

that most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

individual are

intrested

Correct your spelling

interested

in part-time jobs and

further

Linking Words

studies,

Linking Words

however

Add a comma

,however

show examples

they are

moduratly

Correct your spelling

moderately

intrested

Correct your spelling

interested

in unemployment and the least favour is voluntary work. In the beginning, In the year ,2008 most of the individual are

intrested

Correct your spelling

interested

further

Linking Words

study after their graduation.

In addition

Linking Words

, part-time and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

unemployment are done mostly by 20000 students. ,

Linking Words

Moreover

Add a comma

,Moreover

show examples

the

volentry

Correct your spelling

voluntary

work is done only by 3500

people

Use synonyms

after their graduation. compartely the

further

Linking Words

study is the highest.

In addition

Linking Words

, after their post-graduation convocation,

people

Use synonyms

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

like to do part-time and

further

Linking Words

study as their main thing. Other than that 1625 young

people

Use synonyms

were unemployed. Voluntary work is not very popular and it is done only by 345

people

Use synonyms

Submitted by insighttribez on Tue Sep 26 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "further, in addition".

▼

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

▼

Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

▼

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

160 words

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the charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did no go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008. summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevent.

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Computers and A.I. technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, most people try to balance between work and other part of lives. Unfortunately, not many achieve this balance. What problems does this cause? Can you suggest some solutions to this issue?

As countries develop, more and more people buy and use their own cars. Do you think the advantages of this trend for individuals outweigh the disadvantages for the environment?