IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The table below shows how the UK unemployed spent their time last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows how the UK unemployed spent their time last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#uk #time #year #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The table measures in percentage how jobless British women and men employ their day during morning and afternoon in
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last
Correct article usage
the last
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 year.
Overall
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, it can be seen that both
gender
Change to a plural noun
genders
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 spent the majority of their time doing these three chores, housework, shopping and job hunting. Housework was done predominantly by 49% of women in the morning,
while
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 21% of them preferred to clean the household in the afternoon.
This
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 number declined considerably with men, with 19% performing
this
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 chore early in the day, and as low as 7% after 12 noon. Shopping was a preferred activity by females with a total of 43% as opposed to males with just 29%. Visiting friends and relatives was exercised relatively by more females than males, 27% and 18% respectively.
On the contrary
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 more men, 34%, seemed to
allot
Correct your spelling
allow
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 time to find a job than women ( 29%).
This
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 inclination continued to be true when it came to gardening, decorating, walking, playing
sport
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sports
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, drinking and lingering around. Both genders did the following activities with an approximate close rate
such
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 as watching television, reading and staying in bed.
Submitted by roulaga on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the sixth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the sixth paragraph.
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