IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

A 4-week holiday a year can make employees do better at their jobs . To what extend do you agree or disagree.

#-week #holiday #year #employees #jobs
An open discussion has been in place regarding the long 4-week holiday for
employees
, ensuring their better performance at the workplace. I would not agree to
such
 an approach as it might be a problem for most of the
employees
 and employers on a larger scale. Mostly, people have the tendency to
work
 in peace, if they are working a job continuously. The long holidays of 4 weeks can put
employees
 into a relaxing mode which can create loops in
work
 which needs to be done.
For instance
, there are many things going on a day-to-day basis, these can slip out of the memory and take a
while
 to cope with it. Some important emails which need to be answered
also
 might get neglected
due to
 long duration,
therefore
, leading to a gap in
work
.
Secondly
, employers are more concerned with the surge in revenue of the
business
.
Such
 vacations will be done at the risk of
business
 development. Employers will lose their customers to the countries which do not offer
such
 kind of holidays. We are working in a world where customers move
according to
 their interests, they need comfort.
Business
 owners bear their expenses through the money received from customers, losing them means curtailment in the sales and profit. In conclusion, long breaks will not benefit the
business
 and
employees
. There is a general observation that
employees
 only
work
 effectively if they
work
 with fewer breaks.
On the other hand
, recruiter wants to flourish the
business
 which is not possible with
such
 kind of breaks.
Submitted by waqasali345 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: